Who Am I ?

I'm your new best friend thats who! Ok ok, fine I'll give a proper Intro. I guess you could call me Ri (And no its not short for retard!), that way I wont have to worry about any creepers finding me... Cos I'm sure people will be DYING to meet me after reading about my shit show of a life. Yeah I teach infants, which is just as horrendous as you imagine, I guess sometimes its ok... As long as I'm medicated. Yes I have an affinity for pills and beer, sue me. I've never gone to work drunk, medicated is another story. My parents are also hot messes, which may or may not explain where I get it from. They like to be assholes and I am an asshole back by posting the stupid shit they say and do on here! Sweet, sweet revenge...
My friends are alright I guess, I mean its nice to have people who are a bigger mess than me around. Although combine us all together and yikes... I dont think they have quite invented a word to describe that... It's scary...
I guess I was supposed to describe what this blog is gonna be about... Its gonna be about whatever the hell pops into my head. Whatever I feel like writing about, I will and if you dont like that then I suggest you take that sandbag out of your vag, you'll probably feel a lot better... While you're at it, pop a Valium too! Yes I capitalize pill names because they deserve some damn respect!
Now that we got that out of the way... Oh btw friends, no worries I will be using nicknames for all of you assholes cos I'm a good friend like that...  Remember that next time you wanna be a dick...
If you actually just read through all of this then I don even know what to say... I'd give you a cookie but I dont know who you are...
Ok I'm done now...